These are only a few ideas and opinions, there are literally dozens of movies I would die to see remade. There are hundreds that I beg Hollywood will never touch, but they’ll probably hit those first, huh?

SPAWN! (1997)

The Spawn movie has some sentimental value for me and my brother, given it was one of the few movies my Dad let us watch as kids. (Strange choice, Dad. Strange choice). With this is mind, let me say, it’s not really a ‘bad’ movie…it’s just that it was, perhaps, ambitious for the time it was made.

Such a bad ass!

Such a bad ass!

Imagine, though, a remake with the CGI of today! Shiny and bright and new…Spawn has the potential to combine the depth and darkness of Nolan’s Batman trilogy, with the gore and imagination of any of the million zombie movies released in the past decade.

The Shadow (1994)

Am I the only person that ever saw this movie? So few people seem to remember it! Like Spawn, The Shadow was an amazing concept with a unique back story…it just could’ve been better done. Or at least, it could be better done now.

The Shadow is set in the 1930’s, and focuses on Lamont Cranston, who has learnt to ‘cloud men’s minds’ and disappear into the shadows. With The Great Gatsby set for next year, this decadent era is about to become extremely fashionable.

And the remake probably wouldn’t star Alec Baldwin.

Derp.

Derp.

Super Mario Bros. (1993)

Is there anyone in the world over the age of 18 who hasn’t seen this cinematic train crash? The whole thing just seemed to miss the point of Mario completely. The film attempts to hit a gritty, realistic angle…and instead, looks like it was actually filmed in a New York sewer. Ew.

Literally everything about this movie makes me cringe.

Literally everything about this movie makes me cringe.

Generally considered to be one of the worst movies all time, the flick does appeal in an ironic kind of way (it is cheesy and camp, and I like that in my early ’90s features) – but modern film makers would probably be quicker to embrace the colourful, chubby little Mario that we have known and loved since 1985.

Also. The princess is called Daisy, and not Toadstool, or Peach. THAT’S JUST NOT RIGHT.

Street Fighter (1994) /Mortal Kombat (1995)

I’ve lumped these two together, for obvious reasons (THEY’RE BOTH BASED ON ONE-ON-ONE FIGHTERS), but I’ll still address them separately  just to confuse you.

Street Fighter is a cheese-tastic classic, which manages to introduce nearly all of the characters, without really referencing any back stories what so ever. Interesting. Jean Claude Van Damme and Kylie Minogue reportedly had an affair during the filming – that baby would’ve been the embodiment of the early ’90s, surely?

The ultimate power couple?

The ultimate power couple?

Moral Kombat, on the other hand, can’t even be called cheesy. It’s just so bad that it’s good, a full circle kind of deal. There have been rumours of a remake for years, but so far, this prove to be unsubstantiated. Shame, really. Did you see Mortal Kombat: Legacy? Sexy, sexy stuff.

(Side note, does any one know if this particular rumour happens to be true?!)

Anyway, fingers crossed that the next few years will be fruitful for making bad movies better. Any flicks you would love to see brought screaming into the modern age? Let me know on the Facebook page!

S.

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